Our first night "seperate"...

.... was just terrible!! The clock showed 03.00 and I still was awake, crying and felt guilty to have "left"him. That first night when he had to go to the bathroom, I stood behind the door, listening if the nurse was patient and nice to him. And thank God, she was very sweet. I must have fallen asleep around 03.30 having a nightmare that woke me up an hour or so later........ In the morning Magda ( the nurse ) asked me how I slept and I told her how my night was. She said that this was quite normal and that I will sleep better the next night.

Panormitis slept very well in his new bed and he calls Magda " my assistant" . They get along well and as I slept the second night more then 4 hours non stop I gave it another change. Yesterday was the record, from 01.00 untill 09.00 o'clock. As I had "planned" in the beginning to let his "assistance"  come for 3 nights only, now she will come each night. I am sooo exhausted, all my tiredness comes out. Also it is more quiet for Panormitis, he was "leaning" too much on me, 24 hours a day is not nothing.

Now we take a nap together in the afternoon in our bed, which feels good. I can feel that I am able to take  better care of him in the day tim now that I can sleep through the night. You see, it is not only Panormitis that needs to be cared for, we have to teenage daughters as well, and they need also support and attention.

We will see how it goes, we are always in a position to change this program. It is just that in our case we have the highest indication for home care and why not use it ? Magda comes around 23.00 and leaves us at 09.00 in the morning.

Also we have a lady coming (Barbra) who is a volunteer for an institute that helps terminal patients. She is here twice a week, on Wednesday afternoon for a couple of hours and on Friday night so I can take Sophia out after her piano lessons.  What a "blessing" to have all this care!!!!